Do you want to find contentment and gratitude in whatever phase of life you’re in? Hosts Steve and Jason will reveal the key to achieving peace and appreciation in life's ever-changing seasons. Learn how to embrace and thrive in the various stages of life, allowing for resilience and growth, and discover the solution to finding joy and fulfillment, whatever the season.
In this episode, Steve and Jason discuss:
- Embracing the Concept of Seasons
- The Impact of Seasons on Holidays
- Resisting the Season
- Embracing the Suck
- Dealing with Loss
Key Takeaways:
- Discover how to find peace and appreciation in life's ever-changing seasons
- Learn strategies for gracefully navigating through life's challenging moments
- Explore the temporary nature of life's ups and downs and how to adapt with resilience
- Uncover the power of finding meaning and growth in life's toughest challenges
- Embrace the art of savoring and appreciating the joyful moments life brings
“May your seasons be recognized. May we all learn to embrace them and may the embracing of them cause us to see their temporal nature.”
-Steve Scanlon
Connect with Steve and Jason:
- LinkedIn: Jason or Steve
- Website Rewire, Inc.: Transformed Thinking
- Email: grow@rewireinc.com
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Listen to the podcast here:
Steve and Jason- Seasons
Hello and welcome, everybody, to this episode of The Insight Interviews- Powered by REWIRE. This is your host, Jason Abel, and I've got a special guest with us today. Are you a guest? Are you a co-host? What are you? What's your title, Steve? I was going to come up with a third-
I'm Steve, by the way. Scanlon. Thank you. Am I a guest? Am I a host? I'm a ghost.
You're a ghost. Oh, my gosh. There's so many directions we could already, but we're not.
It's a guest host combo because that's better than a hest. I'm a ghost.
It is. We're going to go with ghost. This is your ghost, Steve Scanlon. Well, Steve, we've got a topic. Oh, man. That's a whole direction we could go into, but nevertheless, we've got a topic that we were excited to cover today. This is one that comes up, gosh, it comes up when we're on the platform, when we're in front of groups, it comes up. I think we've touched on this on different podcast episodes before, and I know for you because I've been one of your clients, and I know for me, for my clients, I've touched on this topic inside of coaching sessions. Steve, it's this idea of seasons. Seasons of life, seasons that we're, you know, as we're entering the of the year, you and I just thought this might be a really good topic to. So, you know, okay, boom, there. I've put the topic on the stove. You've got a really unique way and I think an insightful way to open up the topic of seasons. So, Steve, Ghost.
Well, yeah, you know, I think we chose this because of when this podcast will be dropped and kind of, you know, when you think about a season, I guess you could mean that quite literally, like, okay, it's winter or summer. Like, that's a season. You could mean it a little bit more metaphorically, like you're in the earning season of your life or you're in the learning season of your life. It can be thought about, I think, even differently, like a specific season of your life that could be perceived as difficult or particularly great, right? And somebody's going to probably, I hope I got this right, I don't actually know that's what's so cool about our podcast. I'm going to say something that I think I'm right, but I reserve the right to be wrong about this. But in 1966, roughly, which, for the record, was the year of my birth, so if anyone wants to do any math there, but the year of my birth-
That sounds so official. The year of my birth, 1966.
I know, but every time when you're on the phone with someone like your bank, whatever, and they're like, what year were you born? You say 66, and, you know, it's some kid that's 21 years old, they're going, 1966. Like, golly.
Those were the 19 hundreds.
And the middle of them, when you're filling out some form online and they pop open the years and you have to scroll, I can't believe how far I've got a scroll now. Oh, my God. Like 66. Holy Moly. Anyway, in 1966, The Birds made famous a song called Turn, turn, Right? And I'm sure that there are people on the call that do everything, turn, turn. They remember that song, which I felt, and I feel like is-I said, I feel, I'm sure is a pretty good plagiarism of Ecclesiastes three, which is Hebrew scripture, right? In the Old Testament, there is a scripture that says, there is a time for everything under the sun. There's a season for everything, and then in this book, I could rattle some of these off, I happened to have pulled it up just so I could read it. There's a time to be born, a time to die, a time to plant, a time to uproot, a time to kill, a time to heal, a time to tear down, a time to build, to weep, to laugh, to mourn, to dance. I think what's his name's character?
Footloose.
He was like, wait a minute. What? We're supposed to dance. King Soloman said, a time to scatter stones to search, to give up, a time to keep and to throw away, to be silent and a time to speak, to love and hate and war and peace. I think, and I'm sure there are scholars and theologians on the call that might have a different view, but I think there was an idea that maybe we're to see life in seasons. And Jason, like you mentioned, both when we're on stage and when we get to coach people, I'm sure that you have stories, and I certainly do, too, of working with people where reminding them and being with them when they have an insight that whatever they're going through, good or bad, is a season.
Yeah, I know that I have been reminded of this when things are particularly good or especially when they're just not going well, that this is a season, and it will change. There are so many effects of just remembering that, and really trying my best to embody that, because when things are going really good and you're reminded of that, one, it's humbling, which I think is good for us, believe it or not. And two, for me, it makes me more grateful when things are good, whatever it is that I deem is good. Knowing that it's not going to last forever, whether it's a vacation or a relationship milestone or a business success or a health goal achieved or whatever it is, just knowing that, okay, it won't always be like this, so dang, this is nice. It just makes that whatever that thing is that much more sweeter. But then on the other end, when things are bad and dark and maybe not going the way that you would rather life to go, and I think that that happens, well, I know it happens with all of us also remembering, well, this isn't permanent either.
"This is a season right now, but it won't always be like that. Boy, does that give me hope. And it just gives me a sense of like, okay, I can do this because this is not going to last forever. This is a season."
Well, we had talked about doing kind of a given when this is going to drop, and we know this is a reflective time for a lot of people. There's a lot of people that back off a little bit here at the end of the year, and that's totally cool if that's your season. There are times, there are some people who probably go to work harder, whatever. That's not for us to judge or like or dislike or anything like that, but there are quite a few people in this particular winter part of the season, and we had committed to not doing anything overly deep, if that's okay with you. I do want to mention that and maybe we can put this in the show notes as well, but the book Mindsight has been, for many of us here at rewire, a bit of a guide. Dr. Daniel Siegel wrote this book, I think, in 2010 or somewhere around there, but he speaks about these integrations. He's basically talking about what it means to have a healthy mind, which is really a fascinating concept because he talks about the difference between the brain and the mind.
Okay.
But then he gets into these things called integrations. And one of his integrations, Jason, is what he calls temporal integration. So according to Dr. Siegel, who, by the way, I think is one of the most brilliant research scientists out there, but according to this guy, and by the way, he was a clinical psychologist, right, he's not just some guy behind a thing. This guy was in the world for a long time, and one of the things that he noted is when things aren't going as well as you would like, like you said, people have a tendency to make it permanent.
Yeah.
And I hear about that. I've got clients that are going through a difficult time, maybe even financially. We know that there are certain industries right now that are struggling economically, and I hear people say stuff like, oh, here's the new normal. When I hear that the new normal, that is an inadvertent way of going, it's going to be like this forever.
Yeah. Right
It's not for me to tell people. It's not. I just asked some questions around that, and hopefully we can have some insights that, you know, what if it's dark, right, didn't Winston, here's a- we like sayings, right? If you're going through hell, keep going.
Keep walking, because you won't be there forever.-1.png?width=340&height=260&name=Untitled%20design%20(35)-1.png)
Right, and so for Dr. Siegel, the idea that he could help people be more integrated by remembering the temporal nature of things.
Yeah, that's so good. I'm thinking know specifically this time of know we hear everywhere around us, whether it's the marketing and the commercialization and the holiday parties and the festivities and all these things, happy, happy. It might not be a happy time of year for everybody, and just to be aware of that in two ways. One is if you are a person where you like, you love the holidays, and it's a great time of year, and you get to see family and it's festive and presents and whatever, just having that realization that it might be a different season for other people, I think is a good, that's just a good “huh” type of thing. And to be there and then also for you to go, okay, this is a joyful season but might not always be like this, but it is right now. And to be even more joyful, but also just to be cognizant that, gosh, the people around us, they may be just in different seasons than we're in right now.
Well, I think you said it probably even more eloquently than I did, but I find it funny that Dr. Siegel does all this research and he's got this thing, and yet King Soloman seemed to say it in 900 BC. In that same book, I think he says something like, there's really nothing new under the sun. Right? But it's really cool that we can actually have this research and see this, and I don't know, to me, it feels encompassing to think that, yeah, it's just helpful to know there is a time for everything.
Yeah.
And I will say, if you're going through a dark time, I think this is part of what that is, is we know this because Carl Jung said this, right? What you resist, persists. So if you're going through a dark season and you make it permanent, and you're like, I don't want to be in this, don't be in that season, don't be in that season. What's funny is by resisting it, so maybe part of it is going, yes, this is the season.
You're reminding me of just on a little lighter note, I remember taking some drivers driving lessons, like race car driving lessons, and this whole thing about the wall. When you go around the turns, they are very clear about you do not look at the wall because where your head goes is where the car goes. And so that's always been a metaphor for me is don't look at the wall. And so, your whole thing about I don't want to hit the wall, I don't want to hit the wall. If I resist, resist, resist, there is the very real potential for hitting it. And so, yeah, I like what you-
that's kind of a little more of a gruesome metaphor than I was.
I don't know. It came to mind.
Well, you’re a skier. When I went from skiing to snowboarding. I know snowboarding and skiing are the same thing. But let me tell you something. When you're snowboarding and you look down, it wasn't just chance. You look down, you're going down.
You're going down. Yeah.
So, learn how to kind of keep your head up and look up and not resist. And I think that's great. So, look, it's a season, and maybe today, as you and I do this, maybe our simple reminder, we don't need to belabor it, maybe we could offer the idea that you would, whatever season you're in, number one, embrace it, don't resist it, don't shun it. And now, by the way if it's a good season, not really hard to do that. If it's not a good season, what would that mean?
Yeah.
Well, you would only likely embrace a difficult season if you knew that it was eventually going to be over. You're going to tell- I know where you're going. Go ahead.
Well, you and I, on different events that we've done with Rewire, we've invited in the Navy SEALs. I mean, we've been on Coronado Island working out on the same beaches that the SEALs do, and one of the things that, I don't know, there's a handful of things that they did, and still, when they work with us, say, that stick with me. And one of them is the suck ends. And it's part of their training. I mean, it is ingrained with them where you think of to become a Navy SEAL, what you need to go through and, gosh, there's movies and books written about it and everything.
"It's not good, it's not pretty, but their whole thing is as bad as it gets, there will be an end to it. So, if you're thinking, oh, whatever I'm going through life right now, this sucks, this is terrible. Yet embracing it and knowing that that's there, it will end."
And the minute then, the minute your brain and your mind tell you it won't end is the minute you're done.
Ring that bell. Yeah. You're done
You're out. So the suck ends, by the way, I'm sure I have that as a sticker somewhere. If not, we got to make one of those, the suck ends. But it makes more sense when it's accompanied by the first saying. What's the first saying? Do you remember? Putting you on the spot?
You are, you are.
Ok, ready? Embrace the suck.
Oh, embrace the sock. Yeah. Well, it's exactly what we're talking about. Embrace it and know that it will end.
Think of how they go hand in hand, right?
For sure.
Why would even you and I come to a podcast and help people embrace the suck if we didn't know that the suck would end? That's cruelty.
Yup, yup.
But if it does end, it gives us the ability to embrace it. And by the way, embracing it for what it is, is part of letting us gracefully move through it.
Exactly. Right. Yeah.
And it will end because of temporal integration. And so, there's your seasons. There's Ecclesiastes three in a different kind of box.
Seasons in a nutshell. This particular topic is one of those topics where we covered it at a high level, and I think in this time of year, it's kind of like a quick hit, if you will, podcast. It's also the type of topic that we could talk about for half a day, and it's also the type of topic that I know that I'll just speak personally, I've coached some of our clients through for years because it's an easy one and a difficult one at the same time. This concept of seasons.-1.png?width=340&height=260&name=Untitled%20design%20(34)-1.png)
Well, I say we just let it go. Let's let people, may it sit with you again. Maybe we end this show with a little, I don't know, kind of since we talked about Ecclesiastes, like a blessing. Like, may your seasons be recognized. May we all learn to embrace them and may the embracing of them cause us to see their temporal nature. And like you said, even if it's good, you might think, why would you want to see the temporal nature of that? Because I loved what you said, Jason, because it can make the good ones taste that much sweeter.
Yeah.
That's awesome. But they'll end, too.
They'll end, too. And that's okay, because there'll be other ones down the road because of what we're saying. There'll be other ones down the road that will be sweet. So, yeah, embrace the suck. Embrace the really good stuff as well, and know that they'll both end, and that's okay. So, yeah, what a great quick hit today. I will tell you from an insight standpoint, just being reminded of this, and I know we're the ones that are facilitating this discussion right now and executing and having this discussion, this has been a really good reminder for me. The insight that I'm taking away is that heck, even some of the stuff in my life right this minute, that's, I don't know, not so great having a realization that it will end. And then there's other things that are going really great. I do happen to like the holidays. I do like being around family and friends and just being with people that I don't see all the time, that's going to end too.
Well, just to let you know what kind of, we talked about this and is this the right time to say this? I don't know. It's a podcast and we are organic, right? But we're in a season where literally today we probably have to put our dog down. Right? I don't want to end a podcast with that because I don't want people like, oh, but you know how that is. And as early as this morning, I had this moment of like, that's going to be brutal. And I had this idea of like, I'm going to miss her forever, and it made that idea worse, and so just talking to you about it, like, no, it is brutal. I can't escape that. But guess what? The talk about seasons allows me to probably go through it.
Dude, thanks for saying that. I know that you're being, because I know you and your family so well right now. I know that you're being very real. So, thank you for that. And yeah, it is going to be okay, partly because of this idea of seasons.
Exactly. Okay. So, we won't end with that note because that'll be like, womp womp. You’ll get the people writing, it's like, what are you guys doing to us over there? How about this one to end with, if we can't get you to get out and get all jiggy with Ecclesiastes three or whatever, how about a word from St. Bob Marley?
Oh, yeah. Everything.
Don't worry about a thing.
Because every little thing is going to be all right.
Is that not what we're talking about?
Oh, man. Yes. So true. Good philosopher, that Bob. He knew a thing or two.
I think so. We're going to catch some flak for this show. Like what we sang, we were talking about. I don't know, whatever. Hey, I'm grateful for you. I'm grateful for the season that you and I are in together. Thankful for this time, and my hope is that our discussion on this created some insights for you. May you, as the listener, navigate whatever season you're in, embrace it. Embrace the suck. Know that it'll end and that everything will be all right.
Good stuff. See you later, everybody.
Bye.
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