The Insight Interviews

198 Joe New - Learn from it. Don't live in it

Written by Rewire Inc. | Feb 5, 2024 2:20:05 PM

Joe New has spent the better part of the last 22 years as a Mortgage Loan Officer and is a Regional Vice President with CrossCountry Mortgage. He has had the awesome opportunity to build and work with a very talented team of Loan Originators, serving a couple hundred clients a year, with a mission to help them make great short and long-term financial decisions with their housing needs. Joe’s goal is to create smooth and hassle-free loan transactions for his clients by also creating an excellent experience for his Real Estate and Builder partners.

Joe and his family are active and involved in their community.  For almost two decades, he was involved in and sat on the board of a 501c3 (Discovery Training), a ministry that has changed thousands of lives, including Joe’s and his family’s.

Joe and his wife Sharon enjoy a large family of 16, including five grandchildren. He is a passionate sportsman and is proud to call North Texas home and to have raised his family and built his business there.

 

In this episode, Steve and Joe discuss:

  • Gratitude and Reflection
  • Connecting with First Time Home Buyers
  • Genuine Impact on Others
  • Imperfect Action
  • Authenticity in Business and Personal Relationships

Key Takeaways:

  • Master the art of authentic communication to build trust with new home buyers in the mortgage industry
  • Embrace the imperfections in family dynamics for a more fulfilling personal and professional life
  • Gain insights into authenticity in both business and personal life
  • Discover the power of gratitude and self-reflection during life transitions for personal growth and success
  • Learn how to effectively empower change through action, relevance, and courage

 

“I want people to know that whatever they're going through, I've probably been there, and that I'm a husband, I am a son, I am a father and a grandfather, and I really want what's best for people in general.”

 - Joe New

Connect with Joe New

Connect with Steve and Jason:

 

Listen to the podcast here:


Joe New- Learn from it. Don't live in it.              

 

Hello, everybody, and welcome to this week's episode of the Insight interviews. This is your host, Steve Scanlon, not Jason Abel. He's better at it. I wonder how many people when they go, oh, man, that Scanlon guy's doing it. Oh, man, get Abel back in here. Anyway, you get me this week. Here's the good news, I got a cool guest. I'm super excited to bring this individual to the show. I've known this man for many, many years, and it's just going to be a lot of fun. Believe me, if you get to hang around Joe New, if nothing else happens, it's going to be fun. So, hey, Insight Interview world, say hi to Mr. Joe New. Joe, say hi to the Insight Interview world.    
    

Oh, hello to the world, right?

Yeah. There you go.

Hey, are you nervous?

Am I nervous? Yeah, I am now.

Well, because I'm just sitting here thinking this is probably the biggest interview you've ever done. It's going to put you on the map. I mean, you probably should be nervous.

This is why I said it's going to be a zinger. I wasn't nervous, but now I am. Am I nervous? But I will tell you this, you already win the prize of no one's ever asked me that to start off an interview. Well, now I'm a little nervous about how it's going to go. Joe New, really excited to have you on the show. I really thought of what kind of questions I would ask a guy like you, and I don't know if that we'll get to all of them. You sound like you have more questions for me than I have for you, which is kind of funny, but yeah. Here's my first question. You ready? It's not overly mysterious. The first question I like to ask guests this, and we do this on purpose and we can talk about it later, but I want to know today I won't even date it because I don't know when this is going to come out, but don't date it, but today, as you sit there, wherever you are, what are you grateful for?

Oh, my. You don't have enough time. Dude, I have the most awesome family. We're a blended family. We have five children and five grandchildren. And I married so far over my head on a step ladder, I couldn't see over. So, there's so much that I'm grateful for. Just the history of my family and the kids, the grandkids, the life that I'm able to live, and, oh, my goodness, just the ancestry. I'm a big family guy, and I love our family. You know what I'm grateful for? I'm grateful for 2023. I'm glad it's over, but I'm grateful for the lessons of 2023 and that I went through it. I've learned them, and 2023 was a really bad year in our industry, right?     But there was lots of lessons to learn and so we did that. But I could just go on about the whole attitude of being grateful is pretty powerful for me because I have a lot to be grateful for in many areas of my life, right? Well, I've been through some ups and downs, and it's funny, you learn so much in the downtimes, and it's easy to forget them when you're moving above that, but I really try to keep an attitude of gratitude about my life and where I'm at and what I've been blessed with.

That's so good. Already out of the gate. I hope this doesn't put you too much on the spot, but when you think about 2023, you're grateful, and then you mentioned how difficult it was. And, Joe, I have a coach who, you know, sometimes around Thanksgiving, you know, maybe these days it's a little bit trite to sit around the table and go around and do this exercise of what are you grateful, and, okay, my coach asked a question one time, and the question was this: what are you grateful for today that you weren't grateful for when it was happening? So just look back at ‘23. There were a lot of lessons. You don't have to have all of them, and I'm not asking you to pull out your journal. I'm maybe just asking you, hey, what's one thing about 2023 and the difficulty of it that you're grateful for today?        

So, on top of it being a tough market in general in the mortgage industry, that's the industry that I've chosen to build a 22 year career in, and other than that, it was also a transition year. I transitioned from one company to another. And I will tell you that the transition was difficult, not just from operational standpoint, but just an emotional transition, and that was a really difficult, dark moment in my life. And I look back on it and being able to put it in perspective in the scheme of things is a place where I can get a lot of thankfulness. I'm thankful for the people that I worked with and that I left and I don't know that that would have been the attitude a year ago this month, but it is today, right? And reframing that for me through this process of 2023 has been pretty healing, actually.

Wow, Joe, that's so good. I have learned to ask the question of people, if you and I, because you do some teaching yourself through your business, but whenever I do a class or a teaching, Joe, there's two questions you can ask, and one of them is, what did you learn? That's a pretty good question. People can talk about, oh, I learned this or learned that. The other question, and I really applaud Steve Longan, who's one of our researcher and developer, he's also a wonderful coach, but Steve has really built upon the question of, what did you learn about you? Because it's a different question. You and I could talk about what'd you learn in 2023? What'd you learn blah, blah, blah. What did you learn about you? And so, through that transition, because again, I don't want to spend all our time on transitions, but, gosh, Joe, to hear your attitude about a transition today might really be helpful to people. But before we get into that, what did you learn about you?        

I don't want to take all your time on this, but I spent a lot of time over the last 20 something years running a 501c3 called discovery training here in Dallas and we were kind of where the rubber met the road when it came to pain of the heart, right? And so, it was a period in my life where I found a lot of freedom and found a lot of healing and watched people go through that process. And then you get to kind of feel like when you've gone through that, for me anyway, it was like, okay, I'm invincible, right? And so, I went through this transition and went, oh, my goodness, I'm not invincible. This is painful. This hurt, right? And I think what I learned about me is that I'm a human and that I still have feelings and that I'm still vulnerable to having a negative thought, and that the words that I use with myself are really important and that learning how to reframe a particular situation in my life gives me some perspective that I could be able to step away from and look at it a little differently. And of course, the truth is I coach with you, right? I mean, that's no secret. You have been a friend of mine for many, many years, but we haven't coached, really. We've been around that, but just in the last year have you and I had built a relationship, a coaching relationship, and the whole process of metacognition and really taking a close look at how we think has been huge, right? It's not perfect. What is it you say? You say whatever you resist persists. Right?     And I think that's so true. And so being able to reframe that in my mind and take and examine it has been extremely helpful. So, I've learned how to do that this year, thanks to you, by the way, and I'm not trying to plug you. That's a true statement. My wife's sitting here listening to us, and she would tell you that the way I think, the way I talk to myself is much different today than it was a year ago, even when I thought I wasn't perfect, but that I thought I kind of had that figured out and realized that's, that's, that's one thing that I learned about me.

Well, technically it was about five. I love that. I'm taking notes. Joe, this is why I wanted to have you on the show. You're human, you have emotions. One of the things that I wrote down, you taught this work, pain of the heart and all that stuff. You could teach it, we could get it, we could understand it, we could read books, but it doesn't mean that we're not subject to it.

Oh, absolutely.

And there's a certain, I hate to say it, but there's probably a certain humility in maybe realizing like, no, we have to practice the very things that we think we can teach, right?        
            
Yeah. Sometimes that's easier than others, right?

No, it's not easy because we think we should know it. And then there's, I don't know, I don't know, that leads to all kinds of stuff. So thank you for that. I think that's really, by the way, what we resist persists. If you say it like that. Like, oh, Scanlon said that. Dr. Carl Jung said that, right? The famous Swiss psychologist. And so, if anybody listening thinks that, I think that I made that up, they're going to some, I'm going to get some emails.

That's fine. You get to read emails. All I'm telling you is I don't know him, but I know you.

That's great. Well, that's funny. That's great. Well, hey, thank you for that. It's so funny paying attention to how we talk to ourselves, even when you said that about our relationship, it's my initial reaction to try to deflect that. Isn't that funny? Like, oh, no, Joe. First of all, I want to say thank you for that compliment. I think that was great. Having said that, I think coaching is funny because a good coach, whether it's in athletics or anything else, is really only as good as the player chooses to be, right?

That's true.      

Mike Shashewski, who I think was a great coach in college basketball, whether people know him or whatever, I'm sure there were some players around him that didn't choose to be as great as they could be, and all his great coaching in the world might not have made a big a difference as it did for, you know, Michael Jordan. He didn't coach with him, but anyway, for anybody else that played for Duke. Michael Jordan played for North Carolina. I just lost a bunch of people on the east coast because I said that. Sorry. But anyway, I know you practice this with your clients. A lot of times when I'm working with you, I work with you like a colleague because I kind of think that in your line of work, you're coaching people. You're coaching referral partners, you're coaching people, and so, yeah, I think we're just trying to have better players and you're a great player to play with.        

I appreciate that.

Hey, I want to ask you, can we dive into a little bit? Let's not spend too much time in 2023, right? That's living in the past.

Yeah, let's move on, brother.      
  

But we learned from it, right? We learned that we could learn from the past and that's great, we just don't live in it, man. That's a quote. I'm going to say that Joe New said that.

Oh, yeah, that'll work. People will believe that one for sure.

I've never made up a quote in my life, you know, I just quote other people. All right, so we're going to move forward. What are you excited about? Again, it was a tough year, not just in mortgage, I mean, it was a tough year for a lot of people, this post pandemic thing, and economically and financial service. There's a lot of people that have had tough years.  What are you looking forward to as you look ahead and see the landscape? Like, we got a political year ahead of us, there's always stuff that's going to happen, but what are you looking forward to?



Well, so being the Republican that I am, and I still hope that Trump doesn't get elected, but let's forget about the politics because I probably could get this podcast killed if I started in on that.        

You might just have, I don't know.

We could have. We could have done that. But I would tell you that 2024, right, and I'm kind of a student of this industry and I stay on top of it and try to read a lot and look at different opinions. I'm of the opinion that 2024, 2025, 2026 is going to be years of prosperity and I think that we should prepare ourselves for unwilding prosperity. Right? If you're in this business, if you're in the real estate business, I think in general, right? I think the economy is going to bounce back here. I think there's an estimated 35,000,00 1st time home buyers aging into the years of home ownership. And being of my age, I think that we've got to figure out how to communicate with those people because I have children that age and let me tell you you something, they don't talk to me the way that I would like for them to, right? I mean, they will text me. It's like, when did texting become an official form of communication? I don't get it. But so, there's opportunity that's going to come knocking and I think the idea of preparing for how we serve that client, and we serve that customer, and it's funny because Seth Godin said this, right? It's not about the dots, it's about connecting the dots and the data points are out there, right? And I just think that people still need to know how to play the movie forward and connect the dots and help people make sense of it. I'm in the mortgage business, but really and truly, the reason I'm in this business is because I want to help people make great short- and long-term financial decisions, because early on in my life I didn't have that and I made some mistakes, right? And so, if you get something from me, it's because I really, truly care about the financial decisions that people make, and so I’ve become a student of what's coming in the future because I think that's the best way for me to prepare for my team, for my family and how we serve people. How do we navigate this crazy environment that we're in? So, I'm excited about that piece of it. I'm excited about learning. I've really dove into video these days and that's pretty fun because I've got this movie star face, right? And I've got a voice that's made for radio, I'm sure. But from a business standpoint, I'm excited about that.

I saw one of your videos. In fact, you and I spoke about it. I saw one of your videos recently. I love them. I think they're really organic. And you were actually speaking about your business and what people can do to refinance or buy a home. And you were talking about your business and the way interest rates were. You were talking about, I think you were talking about refinancing and it was super interesting because a lot of people in your business, you could be in the insurance business, and you could be in the legal business. I think when people really have it in their heart to take care of people, their messages aren't always about things that make you money. And you specifically said you were talking about a thing that, frankly, Joe, you make money at. If someone wants to refinance a house, you earn a commission on a refinance. And I heard you in this video, you were really nice even though you and I talked about it later, I was like, you had an opportunity to like, because you were like, don't do that right now. And I don't know, Joe, for me, listening to a guy like you say, don't do that, that doesn't make a lot of sense, even when you benefit, it just resonated with the genuine nature of wanting to help people. And so, I don't know. 
       

Yeah, it's funny because you and I did laugh about it, and I could have gone a lot of different directions with it. And you never know who you're speaking to on video, right? So, you kind of have to tone it down a little bit. But I tell people, they ask me what I do for a living, I go, I teach fourth grade math and I teach psychology, right? I'm not saying that to belittle anybody, I'm just saying that the math isn't hard. You just kind of have to know where to take the math to and help people make sense of it. And so, yeah, I think the strategy I came out with was, hey, I get it.

                                                                                                                 
"I know it's tempting to refinance if you're setting it at an 8% rate, and rates are at six and a half today, but the strategy was to be patient, right? Because I think better rates are coming and you don't want to refinance twice."

That was fun to do that video, by the way.


Yeah, well, again, I love it. Again, you and I did have a good laugh over that and fourth grade math. I used to laugh at myself and going, I don't know, for people out there that are still helping their kids with homework, I used to ask people a question, Joe, of at what point in your child's development were you no longer helpful to them in math? Like what grade? And I was like, third? I don't know. I don't remember Pythagorean theorem; I don't know any of that stuff. Anyway, there's probably people listening, going, these guys are idiots., but you're helping people with fourth grade math. I would do that, too, because that's about as far as I can get.


Me, too. If you want me to do calculus, I'd have to go google it, right? I'd have to go figure out how to the formulas, but mortgages, I've kind of got that down and glad to be able to share it with people.

Yeah. As you look forward to the year, what else are you excited about? I love to press ahead, and I love to look forward. Your attitude, and one of the things I hope people are getting, Joe, just listening to you, is I want people to walk away, I didn't tell you this, but just I think you have a view of life that's generally forward thinking, and I don't know that everybody has that and so anyway, tell me what else you’re looking forward to.


Well, I want to digress just for a moment. I did a video right before Christmas or New Year's. I don't remember now, but it was about the word. What was the one word that would mean the most success for you? If you implemented one word in your life in 2024, what would the word be that would either create success personally or professionally with you, right? And I went to the office, and I asked everybody what their word was, and it was all different for everybody. But mine was action, because I just know that if I want 2024 and beyond to be exceptional in all aspects of the word, then action was something I was going to have to take, which led me to the whole video thing, right? And I'm sitting here thinking, I heard Kyle Draper say one time, who's a coach here in our area, he's phenomenal, by the way. I heard him say, the worst video you put out is 100% better than the video that the next guy didn't put out, right? Which is all about being relevant, right? And the whole thing about this 2024 for me is at the age that I am, right, and I'm no spring chicken. I'm not old, by the way, but I'm aging as we all do, but action was going to be a part of it. And making sure that the content that I put out and the things that I do are relevant to people's lives and I'm excited about that, right? I'm excited about being relevant, whether it's with my family or whether it's with my team.

                                                                                                                 
"I want you to walk into my office, whether you do business with me or not, and leave going, you know what? I'm better for having known him or met him, and the guy was real, and he was authentic. And if I can do that, then it's just about meeting enough people and sharing what I can share to make a difference in somebody's life."


Well, I love that. Action. I got to think to myself, because you and I have spent a little bit of time talking about relevance. And you're not old, but isn't it funny? Again, this is the kind of stuff that I get to say, who cares, right? Come on. Let's be transparent here. You ever met someone, they're, like, 62 or 63 years old, and they refer to themselves as middle aged?

That’s me.

Well, I know, but I want to sit down and do math with them. Do you plan on living to be 128? Because what part of middle are we talking? I just think it's super hopeful that you want to refer to yourself as middle aged. Well, okay, well, the middle is pretty wide, then. I don't know. You and I are not middle aged anymore. Are you aware of that?

 


Well, I mean, you're trying to sell me on that idea. I'm not sure I'm going to buy it, but yes.

Hey, you know what? You just keep thinking whatever. We’ll be in our 70’ and we're middle aged. Middle of what, exactly? We're not sure. Joe, I love what you said. I took a note about action. I would hope that'd be a lot of people's thing. It's amazing just how often again we all need to do that. You talk about relevance. I'd love to hear you talk about, to me, they're almost synonymous. If you want to be relevant, it's going to be about action. You stepped up, like, hey, are your videos perfect or whatever? I don't know.

Oh, my gosh, no.

No, but we could sit there and talk about all the improvements you want to make in video, but you know what? You keep hitting send, and that is so infinitely more relevant than people that spend eight months trying to make the perfect one.

Right. I'll go back to the whole action piece, and we'll jump into relevance, but I've been a part of some big branches over the years and had my role of being able to help build those, and it was a lot of fun and we managed a lot of people, and we would have LO’s come into my office and they're licking their wounds and they're trying to figure out how do I level up my business, and it always came down to fear on some level. And we all have that, right? And I think fear does one of two things to you. Either debilitates you or it motivates you, and the choice is yours. You get to choose. And so, the whole idea about action is when things are not working well, over the years, I just picked up the phone and started dialing for dollars. And I dialed for dollars until somebody answered. And then we moved on and we worked our way through it, because it kept me in a positive space so that I didn't get sucked into the vortex of, you know, rates are going to be eight and a half percent, and the market's digressing from 4 trillion to 1.6 trillion and we've laid off 40% of our workforce in this industry, and I can't go there with you. I mean, I have to go there, but I can't stay there because it's not productive, right?

Well, if you stayed there, it would maybe be debilitating.

It would be.

Well, here we are with sayings. I didn't say this, I just remembered it. Maybe that's my skill in life, to remember sayings, and someone's going to email us, and I can't remember who said it. Action creates inspiration and not the other way around.

Yeah, I should have said that, right?

You know what? I think Joe New said it.

Blame it on me. I said it. Yeah.

You know what Joe New said? Action creates inspiration. But people are waiting to be inspired by something, and I think what I'm hearing you say is, you want to be inspired? Take action. Take action. Take action. Keep hitting send.
Keep getting out there. Is it imperfect? Will you make mistakes? And that's the big, you know, we do have some perfectionists out there that are trying to make it perfect and they're not actually going out and doing it. And I've watched your videos. Man, are they far from perfect.


Oh, they are horrible.

No, I'm just kidding. See, I can say that to you, at least. You laugh.

It's funny.

Well, all right. What else? Okay, we're getting close to the end. We're already close to the end, Joe. Isn't that funny?

Time flies.

Here's a question I have for you. What did you hope I'd ask you? What are you excited about? Like, man, I wish Scanlon would have asked me about.        

You gave me so little. You told me to freewheel, and that's certainly what we've done because you didn't really prep me as to a lot of what we're going to talk about, but I don't know if it's what you would have asked me. Here's what I would like for people to know. Can I answer it that way?

Sure. Well, hey, I didn't have any rules. You don't have any rules.

Yeah. There you go, right?

That's the extemporaneous nature of the whole dang thing. Fire away. What do you want people to know?        
            
I want people to know that whatever they're going through, I've probably been there, right? And that I'm a husband, I am a son, I am a father and a grandfather, and I really want what's best for people in general, right? I mean, the people that, whether you come in here to do a consultation about mortgages or whether we're just buddies and friends, at the end of the day, I want what's best for them. And if that means me counseling someone and them moving on to a different place to do business, then at the end of the day, that's just fine. I want people to know that I have elected to create my career in the mortgage space, and I'm really good at it and I'm really good in the industry in general. I grew up with a mother who was a 30-year agent, and so I learned this business very young, not even knowing this was going to be my path, and so I want people to know that when they talk to me that they're getting the real and authentic me. And at the end of the day, maybe we're the right place to do business, maybe we're not, but at the end of the day, people are going to get sound advice and sound counsel, and the decisions are theirs to make however they want to do it. And I do that with my kids as well. I mean, listen, we have less than a perfect family, but we have an open and real authentic relationship with the kids, and they get to voice their opinions and their interest, and they are diverse. I mean, oh, my goodness, they are diverse. And so, we create a place where love is first and foremost and acceptance of who they are as human beings, and we all have our own opinions of what life should be, but at the end of the day, it fires me up to watch our kids and our family grow and mature and become parents and mature. It is really great to watch that, and so that's probably the most important to us. And so, whether you know me, whether you don't know me, whether you ever meet me, I want you to know that's probably the most important thing, is the authenticity of us.

 


I just love that. I'm glad you paused. I take all these notes I wrote down I have less than a perfect family. I started thinking, is there such thing as a perfect family?

No.

I one time heard that the definition of a dysfunctional family is any family that has more than one.

Right. That's spot on. And everybody is different. And I'm going to say something. I have a great family. Don't misunderstand me, we're not perfect. We're human beings. But, dude.


Well, one of your kids is out doing a podcast episode about what kind of kook you are.

Well, absolutely they are. And they'll laugh at it, and so will I.  

Oh, I think that's great. Well, thank God you married that far over your head.

I did. Sharon is awesome.

I know. I've met her. Everybody around you is so grateful for her.

Isn't that the truth?

Joe, I am so grateful to have you. You are my gratitude for the day. And I think as we come to an end here, I love what you pointed us towards. I love hearing your heart about how you serve people and help people in that authentic way that you want to create a difference in people's lives. I love that you're going to remain relevant through action. These are all just great insights. And as people listen to this, and we do sort of end this way, Joe, as people listen to this episode, as I and Jason and I say this, the Insight Interviews isn’t, oh, this guy Joe New had all these thoughts and he thinks and has these insights like this or Steve or Jason have these insights, we want to do this in a way where listening to you and some of your thinking and how you're going creates insights in others. So, my question is, what insights did you have? What's your word for 2024? What are you grateful for as a listener? As you hear Joe speak about this, and Joe, we're all grateful for you. Thank you for being out there. I have no doubt that you'll make the year great as you live into your word and keep hitting send. And certainly, through the show notes, we're going to make it clear how to get a hold of you and so people can either link in with you or whatever.
        

Sure.

We'll make that clear. And I'm just grateful for our time and so wanted to say thank you.


Dude, I'm honored that you would even have me on your podcast. And Steve, I could not be more thankful for you as a friend and a colleague and a coach. And whether you want to realize it or not, you do really great things in people's lives, and kudos to you.

That's very good of you, Joe. Thank you. Well, listen, you and I get to go off full of gratitude for the day. Thank you so much. Thanks, y'all for listening to this episode of the Insight Interviews. When you have those insights, let's play like Joe New and make sure that we take action. So, thanks so much for joining us, Joe, and we'll see you next time here on the Insight interviews.

Have a great day.        

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